No Social Media — But Still, I Must Write

So I’ve quit… pretty much all social media. It made me miserable, and it made me act like an ass. Despite occasional cravings, I’m happier– so far.

But, I’ve come to realize that Facebook (et al) was an outlet for one of my stronger urges: to write. I write about a lot of things. Sometimes it’s just journaling — “Dear Diary…” Sometimes it’s about politics or current events. Sometimes it’s philosophical musings. But a lot of the time, it’s about my favorite topic: me.

So, I figure I’ll keep writing on here.


Quitting You

So, I’ve quit Facebook. it was both strangely hard and strangely easy.

Hard because… well, you’d be amazed how many people treat quitting Facebook like committing suicide (“no, Ma, it’s not a cry for help. Yes, I know if I was less ‘weird’ I’d meet more girls. I KNOW, ma…”)

Easy because… well once you find that trigger, and pull it, it all gets so… quiet.


Buh-bye (mostly) Facebook

I’ve decided that “social media” ain’t for me. Because my desire to know what “people think” about me rises to nearly the level of an addiction, it just leads to unhealthy places. So I’ve cut off almost all my access to Facebook (I don’t tweet almost ever, and the rest — Instagram, Pinterest, and all the other wanna-be Facebooks — have never been on my radar). I’ve kept my FB account because I have friends I want to keep in touch with there. But most of my “real life” friends have my “real life” contact info, and for the few who don’t, I’ll ping back periodically to make sure I’ve left no stragglers behind.

Next adventure: “real life” 😀


Couldn’t Do It

I tried meditation today, but for some reason I just couldn’t get my brain into the same space as before. I’m not sure why, but I couldn’t recapture that feeling of peace and tranquility from last time.

Perhaps I was grasping for it too hard?


On Addiction

glass-of-beer.jpegSo, I’m an addict. Technically an alcoholic — that’s the only “medical” diagnosis I have, but just generally an addict. If I’m not careful, I can buy things on Amazon compulsively (and, I’m sure they love me for it), or compulsively seek sex, or whatever. It’s just a latent trend in me. But alcohol — specifically, usually, beer — is the worst, because not only is it an unhealthy activity to begin with, but it lowers your inhibitions and impairs your judgement, making it that much harder to make a better choice after you’ve finished that “just one drink.”

Now, I’m not going to go into all the sordid details of my drinking career — DUI, bad behavior, blackouts — it’s all pretty much standard fare for an alcoholic. I’ve never hurt anybody behind the wheel of a car, I’ve never raped or murdered anyone, and I’ve never pissed myself (that last one is, oddly, a matter of personal pride). But I’ve done just about everything else.

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Sometimes just being aware of your own mental and emotional state is enough.

I did 30 minutes of mindfulness meditation today. For those not in the know, mindfulness meditation is a meditative practice where you strive to focus attention on the mind processes and sensations themselves. In short, you try to quiet your “monkey mind” — the part of your brain that’s always talking and prattling away, and focus on simply observing.

It’s a lot harder than it sounds. Some things I noticed today…

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